Bipolar and Brilliant- Kurt Cobain

Mental Health Monday

“I'm so happy. Cause today I found my friends.
They're in my head. I'm so ugly. But that's ok.
'Cause so are you. We've broke our mirrors.
Sunday morning. Is everyday for all I care.
And I'm not scared. Light my candles. In a daze cause I've found god.”

Lyrics from Nirvana song Lithium

I love Kurt Cobain, Nirvana came on the music scene shortly after I had attempted suicide, and been locked up in the mental ward. His music spoke to me, during my times of teen angst, and depression.

It was no secret that Kurt was mentally ill, as a child he would seek sanctuary in his bedroom closet.

Since his youth Kurt spoke constantly of suicide and death. "I hate myself and want to die" was his mantra - he repeated it constantly in conversation and in his journals, and even intended using it as an album title.

Kurt also abused alcohol, heroin, LSD, marijuana, and pain killers, which is common among those with bipolar. He vacillated between bouts of debilitating depression, and productive high energy phases. His legendary stage presence was often manic.

He has also been known to extreme fits of rage. Demolishing hotel rooms, and stage sets.

Above all other things , Kurt Cobain was a writer, and a poet. There are a huge amount of writers, poets, and musicians that suffer from mental illnesses.

His music is legendary, it was, prior to him even committing suicide.

“On April 8, 1994, Kurt’s body was discovered at his Lake Washington home by an electrician who had arrived to install a security system. Apart from a minor amount of blood coming out of Cobain's ear, the electrician reported seeing no visible signs of trauma, and initially believed that Cobain was asleep until he saw the shotgun pointing at his chin. A suicide note was found that said, "I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music, along with really writing . . . for too many years now". A high concentration of heroin and traces of Valium were also found in his body. Cobain's body had been lying there for days; the coroner's report estimated Cobain to have died on April 5, 1994.”

To read the whole suicide note go here.

The world lost a lot when he killed himself, but most importantly a little girl lost her father. Bipolar can be so deadly, please get help for your self or your loved ones if your living with untreated bipolar disorder.